


Puppy Power

by ThreeHats



Category: Alice In Wonderland - Lewis Carroll, World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Crack, Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 20:38:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7522294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThreeHats/pseuds/ThreeHats
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tilly said as she escorted the wrestler to the door. “Until we meet again Mr. Woods. I hope the wedding today is beautiful.” She stood on her hind legs and saluted him as he walked through the portal, “Dogspeed Xavier Woods”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Puppy Power

**Characters:** Xavier Woods and Tilly the dog  
 **Location:** Wonderland  
 **Scenario:** Trying to lift Thor’s hammer

After having fallen through the hole down to Wonderland, Xavier Woods was quite surprised to find that he was no longer at ring dancing alongside his friends Kofi and Big E. All he remembers prior to the tumble down the hole is dancing provocatively and playing the trombone while going to get another trombone out from under the curtain for a trombone wedding. He had even worn his fancy unicorn horn that day with a bow tie positioned at the bottom. 

“I can’t miss this trombone wedding!” Xavier cried in a huff. “I’ve already paid the planners, and was even made best man. Francesca II would kill me if I missed the big day.” He looked around and found everything around him was quite...off. Everything seemed rather normal and slightly askew at the same time. Xavier dashed off down the most well-walked path, and followed signs that said “Exit”. While running, he came across flowers that were singing in a circle, with something obviously in the middle of them. 

Looking past the fact that flowers could talk as he figured this might be Wonderland, he approached to see what all the fuss was about under the guise of asking directions. He knew wonderland was notorious for leading you astray, and figured it would be best to ask to be sure. When he got near enough, the flowers all stared at him with a bit more judgement in their eyes than he was expecting. “Excuse me, but I was wondering if you could tell me find the way out?” 

“Out he says! Well I’d just as well fancy someone moving this massive man-tool out of our midst. If you can get it away from our delicate and fragile frames without injuring anything with that massive oafish body of yours, then I suppose we could help. “I would appreciate that greatly ladies.” He said with a gentlemanly bow.

Upon coming closer Xavier laid eyes on the task ahead of him and groaned heavily. “Man you gotta be kidding me.” In the center of the brightly colors flowers was Thor’s hammer laying on it’s side, looking far less intimidating sitting amongst flowers. “If I can go to Wonderland underneath the ring, there’s a good chance that actually belongs to Thor...How am I going to pull this off? That wedding is probably about to start…” he sighed and thought that there may be a chance there’s enough good in him to move it inch by inch until it’s out of the flowers, but then there came the issue of destroying the flowers in it’s path, and figured he wasn’t allowed to so much as fold a petal while removing the hammer. 

“Well, I’ll just try to do my best!” He said rubbing his hands together. “If you would be so kind as to move back as far as your roots will allow” he said, his eyes lingering on a pink rose that blushed to a dark red as the flowers started to sway outward. There was just enough room for him to gain his footing around the hammer, and like so many days at the gym beforehand, he was standing in proper form to do a squat that would hopefully help him raise the massive weight. His body was poised and ready to lift Mjollnir from it’s patch of dirt on the ground, and as he grasped the hammer he pulled with all of his strength, but to no avail. “I was hoping this would be a fluke...but it looks like it’s going to be more complicated than that….” Xavier hopped out of the ring of flowers and looked over the hammer again, knowing he wouldn’t be able to move it. “Normally I would try and find other options, but I know I won’t be able to move that, I’m sorry.” Xavier said with a sigh. “Quitter.” a voice from behind him barked. He turned and was surprised to find a small tan chiweenie pitbull dog trotting up to the flowerbed. 

With a small bound the dog hopped over the flowers and looked back at Xavier. “Before you ask, my name is Tilly. I fell between the seat cushions in my home and ended up here. I’m assuming there’s some sort of dimensional tears that are happening. Looking at this hammer tells me my thoughts on the matter are confirmed.” she said, eying over the hammer. “How do you know what that is? Aren’t you just a dog in the real world?” Xavier asked, started to feel a bit of shock overtaking him that he may actually be stuck in another dimension, letting his friend down on her very special day. “I’m a lap dog, if you don’t think I haven’t watched at least one Thor movie in my lifetime, you’re kidding yourself.” 

“I have to get back Tilly. I can help you with whatever this is after the main event, but not right now” He was willing to go on an action-packed adventure with a talking dog, but not at the expense of Francesca II’s wedding. Tilly eyed him carefully. “We may not need your help regardless, but I understand wanting to be there for your friend, even if she is a trombone.” Tilly said with a wrinkly dog smile. She picked up the hammer in her mouth as easily as if it were a stick. “How can you do that??” Xavier asked with some measure of surprise. “I’m a dog, we have no inherent good or evil, so I’m a neutral party. Besides, me and Molly go way back.” Xavier figured there was no point in arguing with the logic, and then remembered he had somewhere to be. “So how do I get out of here?” he asked. “The exit signs were a safe bet, and you’re only about 20 feet away from a dimensional rift out of here. I have to take this to Shield HQ, but I’ll walk you out.” Tilly said as she escorted the wrestler to the door. “Until we meet again Mr. Woods. I hope the wedding today is beautiful.” She stood on her hind legs and saluted him as he walked through the portal, “Dogspeed Xavier Woods”


End file.
